I used to pressure myself to write something profound
Predictably came out pretentious when I wrote it down
Pontificating like my opinions would change the world
‘Til I was 17 I could barely talk to girls
Arrogance and anxiety are a shitty mix
My college days humbled me, reality’s a bitch
Tried to get in where I fit in and just do my part
Coping with writing and the martial & erotic arts
I fell in love a couple times but didn’t treat ’em right
The few I didn’t push away I was never their type
Either ’cause I was too broken or I was whack
It took me years to learn to love and be loved back
Working to break the cycles of self-sabotage
Embrace reality instead of chasing a mirage
Just ’cause we wanna fuck each other doesn’t make us fit
It took a while for that to sink in, my head was thick
Product of my parents, misread what it meant
I used to think for their sins I had to repent
Truthfully, I needed to find out who I was
Whether it’s nature or nurture, I was more than blood
I found my voice in writing, I made sure it was heard
I had to flex every noun, adjective, and verb
Nerdy, flirty, empathetic, the traits I embrace
Taking life daily with a smile on my face
It took me thirty years to learn to love myself
And I’m grateful to everyone that ever helped
Begging your pardon, I’m needlessly wordy
Sentimental, pensive, this my 30 for 30