Trapped in the darkness
Fighting for a way out
Wet matches, no spark
Drowning in doubt
Trapped in my fears
Can’t sleep at night
Fighting my tears
Discarding delight
What is going on?
Why insomnia?
Or is it something more?
The shadow of death seems to surround me, ugh…
It haunts me
Blurs my vision
Or are those still tears?
No matter, I’m still living
But what is living
Without a sense
That the people you were giving
Love have all but spent it
They’re either dying
Or they’ve been given up
Or they’ve been lying
And you’ve just given up
Have I been crying?
Only in my heart
It’s heavy, the weight multiplying
Achebe was right, Things Fall Apart
I’ve not yet taken the journey
I’ve not yet begun to search
I’m still learning
The subtleties of birth
Birth, not in the sense of delivery
But of becoming the new you
Of facing destiny
And not getting screwed [over]
Why do I feel this way?
Why do I suddenly yearn for my friends?
Why am I alone in my own family
When they’ll be here ‘til the end?
Why do I think of what could have been
Why do I think of it now?
Why do I think of my brother, my friend
And how he fell to the ground?
Why do I ponder mortality
Why can I not sleep
Why have I not hit insanity
Why is the wound so deep?
Why are the lost crushes returning to cause me pain?
Why are my thoughts dwelling on the Heartless yet again?
Can one gain power by steeling the heart, casting love away?
Or is it just an easy path to run away from pain?
If one discards one’s heart to do away with pain
And the appearance of strength is little more than feigned
Will one ever be able to feel the same?
Or will it drive the outcast insane?
If the heart is fed to darkness, morality consumed
And love eternal locked away in an abysmal tomb
The agents of chaos and pain, spawned from Hell’s womb
Will they be destroyed or is one forever doomed?

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